Tuesday, January 25, 2005
Posted at Tuesday, January 25, 2005 by gaurdian
Wednesday, January 05, 2005
My parents got a divorce when I was 7. I blamed it on myself. Throughout elementry and middle school, I never fit in. I was the outcast. I had friends and all but not ones that are close. My freshmen year of high school I was in a school play. Durring play practice everyday someone come up to me and talked to me. She didn't give up on me. I finally gave in and walked up to her. The last performance she asked me if I was saved and I told her I dunno. She knew I wasn't and I accepted Jesus in my heart that night. A year passed and I grew then things started to hit. Different things brought me down and I wasn't where I needed to be spiritually. I did things to myself that wern't good. I tried to od once. I was into self-mutalation. I burnt and cut myself. I didn't find myself worthy. Thats my way of punnishing myself. I hated myself at that time. God put different people in my life and they just loved me. They just loved me, they showed me His awesome unwielding love. I felt that love so strongly. I wanted that love in my life. I decided to give over my addictions to Him and He started to heal me. He lifted me up. All the pain and anguish in my past was forgotten, and forgiven. I grew so much over this summer. It was this summer when I found out stuff about my stepdad and my mom's relationship. I've been finding out stuff about my stepdad. He wasn't having the affair back last November, it wasn't this summer, but the last. My mom and him got a house and it was in his name and my mom had to pay for it. He played my mom so well. Now the person he had the affair with is living in that house, and her girls. This world is telling me to hate them. To not give them any thought. I'm not doing that though. I've decided not to listen to this world, but to listen to my God, because His voice is true. That is the voice of truth. I've decided I'm going to listen and beleive His voice. He's telling me I need to witness to them, and I'm going to. I hope this was encouraging to you.
in Christ,
<3 Sara
Posted at Wednesday, January 05, 2005 by gaurdian
hello, I don't know all who will remember who I am... here goes. So many things have happend since I last updated. My mom filed for divorce to not be married to my stepdad. He wasn't having the affair back in November, it was back not this summer but last summer. The person and her girls are now living at my old house I used to live in and there's nothing I can do about it. My mom isn't an alacholic. My stepdad bought the girls out bowling. It made me sick because he never took me and my mom out like that just for fun. My stepdad forged my mom's signiture checks and could loose his real estate lisence for life if he is proscuted. God has really been amazing this whole time. He has been who I've been clinging to for everything latley. Those girls go to my school. I see them everyday. God's been telling me I need to witness to them how amazing He is. He can help everybody through whatever they're going through if they just let Him in. I hope you all have a blesed new year.
in Christ,
<3 Sara
Posted at Wednesday, January 05, 2005 by gaurdian
Monday, November 01, 2004
www.greatestjournal.com/users/gaurdian thats one of the journals i use. make an account and comment on this and tell me you're a friend from blogdrive and i'll add you. i'm not going to close this account. i love all of you.
in Christ,
<3 Sara
Posted at Monday, November 01, 2004 by gaurdian
Wednesday, September 29, 2004
sorry for lack of updates...
i don't barley use this journal anymore. i have another journal if you want to read that one. but you have to have a greatest journal account and add me first for you to be added. i'll update on this very limited though... i hope you all have a blessed night.
in Christ,
<3 Sara
Posted at Wednesday, September 29, 2004 by gaurdian
Monday, September 13, 2004
it wasn't a partically hard day in school, its just I got out on the wrong foot this morning. Nothing particularly bad happened. It just turned bad is all. I really thought I dealt with things I was thinking today... I really did. But i guess not... I thought i replaced satan's lies with scripture that could help fight and eventually conqur. I used to have thoughts of suscide but I have given all of those desirs over to God or did I? I don't have any desire to do anything but I have thoughts, thoughts that could turn into desires. The thing I hate about it is there is no reason why I would want to even harm myself. If I let satan get a foothold on my life then I'll amost be sure to be done for. Sorry for ranting to all you guys... I hope you all have a blessed night.
in Christ,
<3 Sara
Posted at Monday, September 13, 2004 by gaurdian
Wednesday, September 08, 2004
last night i was praying at church. the prayer service. the people i felt i was suposed to deciple either have been faking it for a long time or they're athiest. I prayed i would find a freshmen that i could deciple. a freshmen thats my freshmen. that i could train and build up to what God wants in her. to train her to be righteous and holy in God's sight. to help along the way. I think i found my freshmen. I've decided i'm going to invite her to TFC tomarrow. I want to pour into somebody. i want to build someone up so they can take my place and be better than me when i leave. i want to leave behind a legacy. thats all i have.
in Christ,
<3 Sara
Posted at Wednesday, September 08, 2004 by gaurdian
Saturday, September 04, 2004
in the morning before homeroom we have prayer out at the plag poll which has been amazing. it the best part of my day.
homeroom is boring because my friend that i used to talk to is now going to appolo and shes not at elida anymore...
first period with Mr. Apple isn't as bad as i thought it would be. we have homework every night except days right before and after test days. thats cool. the stuff that we are doing isn't that hard so far... i hope to get an A in this class.
second peroid is fun. Mr. Horn is a really cool teacher. We're just reviewing spanish verbs and other stuff that beleive it or not i rememer. I want to get a good grade in this class like a A but i dunno. doesn't seem like its going to be that hard.
third period is social studies with Mrs. Tilly. she is so cool, if i do all my work and pay attenchen in that class, it will be an easy A.
fourth period is English with Mrs. Jackson. i dunno about this class. i know i'm not good at english but i'm going to work hard in this class so i can possibly get an A.
fifth period is Chemistry one. The first day of school she ate a candle. it was cool. the class is extremly boring and i think it'll be my hardest class, I'm going to work hard to try to get a good grade in that class.
lunch. i get to do my homework in there. i get to talk to friends. i get to eat. i like that.
choir. its fun. i get to talk to underclassmen and i get to sing. thats very fun to me.
study hall. i get to do my homework. and if i don't have any hw, i get to read my bible. i love that.
thats my schedule. i hope you all have a blessed day...
in Christ,
<3 Sara
Posted at Saturday, September 04, 2004 by gaurdian
Thursday, September 02, 2004
thats how many days. i know that couldn't have been on my strength. sorry i havn't updated latley. school started Tuesday and i just been really tired... this is all i'm going to write.
in Christ,
<3 Sara
Posted at Thursday, September 02, 2004 by gaurdian
Saturday, August 28, 2004
tonight's going to be fun!
tonight's going to be awesome! we're going to have an overnighter at the TFC building. its going to be awesome! its going to be from 9:30 tonight till 7 tomarrow morning. we have to promise to go to church the next morning. i think it'll be fun. i can do the whole little or no sleep once in awhile. i hope you all have a blessed day!!
in Christ,
<3 Sara
Posted at Saturday, August 28, 2004 by gaurdian
